being hurt is just a part of being human. you are an imperfect human being and so is everybody else. you are going to hurt people. sometimes intentionally. sometimes unintentionally. sometimes on purpose. sometimes not on purpose.
people are going to hurt you. a hurt does not have to destroy a relationship. it doesn’t even have to cause a disconnect very long if you will own up to it, admit it, make amends for it, grow from it, reconcile over it. you’re going to hurt even those you love the most. in fact, you’ll probably hurt the most those you love the most because you know them the best and you can get close to them and hurt them in ways other people can’t. hurt doesn’t have to destroy a relationship if you deal with it. but if you hide a hurt it turns into resentment. and hiding a hurt only intensifies the pain. and hidden hostility will eventually eat you up.
what’s the key to reconnecting when you’ve been hurt? the reconnection is forgiveness. there is only one antidote in the entire universe for dealing with hurt. there’s only one thing that will help you get over your hurt. forgiveness. nothing else can do it. no pill, no therapy, no book, no seminar, no tape, no trying to push it out of the way and deny it and forget it. it’s not going to heal the hurt. they say, “time heals everything.” it does not. have you ever sat in a doctor’s office? you didn’t get well waiting. time makes some hurts deeper, worse. you need to forgive.
why should i forgive? two reasons:
1. JESUS CHRIST has forgiven you. you’ll never have to forgive anybody else more than GOD’s already forgiven you.
2. it’s the only way you’re going to get over your hurt. there is no other way. for your own sake you need to forgive. i didn’t say they deserved it. they don’t deserve it. you didn’t deserve to be forgiven by GOD. it’s not a matter of deserving. it’s a matter for your own sake the only way you can get on with your life is to let go of the pain. and the only way you can let go of the pain is to forgive those who’ve hurt you. if you hold on to it, you continue to allow people from your past to hurt you today and that’s dumb.
colossians 3.13 (nlt), you must make allowance for each other’s faults and forgive the person who offends you. remember, the LORD forgave you, so you must forgive others.
the bible says, love keeps no record of wrongs. do you keep a record of wrongs. do you keep a little register in your mind of all the things they’ve done to hurt you so when you do something wrong you use their wrongs to justify yours. do you keep a record of wrongs so you can bring them out as ammunition later on? anytime you or i do that we’re being unloving. and we’re causing a greater disconnect rather than a reconnect.
just a thought from the front porch…
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