love sometimes takes courage…

JESUS always knew the right thing to do. if you studied HIS life, you’d find that sometimes JESUS avoided conflict, sometimes HE resolved conflict and sometimes JESUS actually created conflict. in your life, all three of those responses are sometimes going to be appropriate. sometimes you need to avoid conflict. sometimes you need to resolve conflict. but sometimes you need to create conflict.

most people have a misunderstanding that keeping the peace means avoiding confrontation at all costs. it means swallow my hurts, hide my feelings, repress the truth, ignore problems in my life, pretend that everything is ok. but the bible says that only causes more problems. the bible says that repressing the truth rather than dealing with the truth causes trouble.

proverbs 10.10 (tev) says, someone who holds back the truth will cause trouble. but the one who openly confronts works for peace. in theory, we all believe that honesty is the best policy. but in practicality, there are a lot of times in life when we don’t think honesty is such a good idea. speaking the truth is not such a positive thought.

for instance, “if i told my father the truth about him, he’d never speak to me again.” “if i told my husband how i really feel about our marriage, he’d blow up.” “if i told my boyfriend what i don’t like about him, he’d leave me.” “if i told my wife about my frustration with our love life, she’d accuse me of a one-track mind.” “if i told my boss that what we’re doing is unethical, i’d get fired.” “if i confronted my friend and told him he needed counseling, he’d never see me again.”

love is not always easy. love is not always fun. love sometimes takes courage. love sometimes is tough. and love sometimes includes a confrontation.

we’ve been looking at the question, “what is love?” we’ve talked about some of the lighter areas of love like love is kind, love is patient, love is respectful of others. but we’re now going to another level of love. we’re going to graduate-level loving. if you want to move out of grade-school loving and become a graduate-level lover, sometimes in life you’re going to have to do what we’re going to talk about now. it’s not an easy thing to talk about.

the bible says in 1 corinthians 13.6 (niv), love rejoices with the truth. ephesians 4.15 (tev) tells us, speak the truth in a spirit of love.

there is a skill that almost no one is good at. i’m certainly not good at it. and i doubt of any if you are really professional in doing this skill. because it’s a skill that we’re never taught. nobody sets us down and shows us the steps to doing it effectively.

it is how to confront someone you love in a loving attitude. how do you do that? if you want to have a better relationship, if you want to help other people, sometimes you have to say tough things that they don’t want to hear but they need to hear it.

just a thought from the front porch…