change through our relationships…

there’s a lot of ways that GOD challenges change in our lives.  HE does it through our circumstances.  HE does it through what HE’s written to us.  but one of the main ways HE does it is through our relationships and that’s not always comfortable. 

paul wrote to some people in the town of corinth that he’d had to have a difficult conversation with.  it hadn’t been a comfortable conversation and yet after it was all over he writes to them, 2 corinthians 7.9 (ncv),  now i am happy.  not because you were made sad, but because your sorrow made you change your lives.  that’s how it works. 

notice it says, made you.  your sorrow made you change your lives.  they’d had a difficult conversation and it made them sad but that sadness made them change for the positive.  that’s when we change.  we change when we’re made to change. 

most of us don’t change because it’s a great idea.  we don’t like to change.  we like to stay comfortable.  so we change when we’re made to change.  we change when we’re put in the middle of the ring of life.

listen, we don’t change when we see the light, we change when we feel the heat.  so we’re made to change when that difficulty comes into our lives and GOD can use other people to be the ones that challenge us towards that change that we deep down all really want.

proverbs 27.17 (ncv) talks about how HE does this.  the bible gives us this picture.  as iron sharpens iron, so people can improve each other.

that may sound like a beautiful picture but in reality it’s a pretty tough circumstance.  when metal hits metal what happens?  sparks fly!  absolutely! 

have you ever seen that happen in a relationship?  in fact here’s how it happens.  the metal hits the metal.  someone says something to me that hits a rough spot or a dull edge in my life and the sparks fly.  first comes the sparking, then comes the barking – the yelling. 

i don’t like it when the sparks begin to fly in my life.  i don’t like it when people challenge something in my life.  do you?  because of that you and i go through a little bit of tough time in that relationship.  but on the other side of that comes the change.  you can’t do it any other way.  it’s metal hitting metal, that’s the picture.  you can’t do this easily. 

just a thought from the front porch…

approval addicts…

we're in a society that produces approval addicts.  “what do other people think?”  that’s the ultimate question.  what will other people think of me?  the bible says that is a trap. 

proverbs 29.25 (niv), the fear of man will prove to be a snare.  but whoever trusts in the LORD is kept safe.  when you worry about what other people think, you're headed for trouble. 

so how do we develop this fear of rejection?  simple.  from experience because you've been rejected.  it's that easy.  some of those hurts that you've had from people rejecting you, you've never gotten over.  you can get the fear of rejection from all directions - your marriage, your family, your parents, at school, at work, from former friends, from disappointments, from criticisms, from a look.  have you ever seen a look kill somebody?  have you ever seen a parent manipulate a kid with an eyebrow?  the fear of rejection!

and it affects every area of your life so how do you overcome it?  well for one you must put GOD in first place.

psalm 27.1 (niv), the LORD is my light and my salvation.  i will fear no one.  GOD is my light.

what does light do? 

light illuminates.  i see things more clearly.  most people are more afraid when it's dark than when it's light.  have you ever been in one of those caverns where they turn the lights out and show you total darkness?  it's not a fun feeling.  david said, when i’m confused and afraid, GOD lights my way.

light protects.  it provides security.  have you ever seen these high tech alarms where you walk on to the property and every light in the house goes on?  some of you have those spotlights, that if there's movement in your backyard, the light flips on.  light is a source of security. 

light energizes.  it lifts your mood.  it brightens your day.  have you ever been out on a cloudy day?  you were moody and low and all of sudden the sun broke through and it changed your attitude.  it lifts your spirit.  i think it's not by accident that at the darkest time of the year during the winter, when the nights are longest, we decorate our houses with bright lights. CHRISTmas. 

david's saying, “my relationship to GOD has the same three effects.  HE illuminates my life, protects my life, energizes my life.  i'm not going to be afraid.”  do you have a relationship to GOD like that?  if you don't you're probably susceptible to the fear of rejection.  maybe you're looking to somebody else to be your illumination, to make things clear for you, to be your protection, your security.  you're looking to somebody else to energize your life and lift your mood, brighten your day and provide happiness.  david says, GOD is my light.

just a thought from the front porch…