with every promise there is a premise...

it is so important for us to see that in the bible with every promise that GOD gives to us there is a premise that we must meet.

here is the great promise from GOD in philippians 4 that paul gives, verse 19 (ms), you can be sure that GOD will take care of everything you need, HIS generosity exceeding even yours in the glory that pours from JESUS

and here is the premise, verse 18 (ms), i do want you to experience the blessing that issues from generosity. and now i have it all—and keep getting more!

the promise, I will meet all your needs; the premise, i must be generous to others.

proverbs 11.25 (niv), a generous man will prosper; he who refreshes others will himself be refreshed. when you're generous to others, GOD is going to be generous with you.

luke 6.38 (ms), giving, not getting, is the way. generosity begets generosity. (niv), give to others, and GOD will give to you...the measure you use for others is the one GOD will use for you. you be generous and GOD will bless you.

the premise of this promise is that we first must be generous with others. paul tells us that unless i'm obeying GOD in the matter of giving, GOD doesn't give any guarantee to meet my needs. GOD is not obligated to meet my needs if i'm not obeying what HE's told me to do. GOD says we can short circuit the power and the promise in our life. we can block the flow of blessing by being
stingy.

just a thought from the front porch…

one of the greatest promises in the bible...

in this last passage of philippians is probably the greatest promise in the bible. it is so all
encompassing almost any other promise will fit under its umbrella.

GOD's promise to meet your needs is philippians 4.19 (ms), you can be sure that GOD will take care of everything you need, his generosity exceeding even yours in the glory that pours from JESUS. the new international version says, and my GOD will meet all your needs according to HIS glorious riches in CHRIST JESUS.

GOD says, "I will meet all your needs." then if that is true why do people have needs? a lot of CHRISTians have tremendous needs. why aren't they being met? is GOD a liar? is his promise not valid?

the answer to the question is that this promise is not for everybody. it is not applied to every
person, even every CHRISTian.

with every promise there is a premise. there is a condition that GOD says, "if you do this, i will do that." people want to take the verse 19 promise and apply it to their lives while avoiding the premise of verses 14-18. you cannot claim verse 19 unless you're doing what verse 18 talks about.

just a beginning thought from the front porch...

just give it to HIM...

this passage philippians 4.7 also says, (nlt), …HIS peace will keep your thoughts… the word keep in the greek is a military term. it means a sentry guard, a garrison, or a detachment of soldiers. the book of philippians was written to a group of people who lived in the city of philippi in greece. the city of philippi was a roman colony that was protected by the roman legion. the people knew this word very well for they knew the roman legion kept the peace in philippi.

paul used the word that he knew everybody would know and says, that's the way GOD will guard your mind and heart when you have a relationship with JESUS CHRIST and trust him moment by moment. instead of worrying about everything, you pray about everything. and you thank GOD for all things and keep your mind on the right things. GOD will put a garrison, a sentry guard, around your heart and when worry comes knocking at the door HE will protect you with HIS peace.

what's got you worried? finances? the economy? your health? your marriage relationship? your kids? your career? what makes you anxious, that raises the stress level in your life?

how do you normally respond to stress? what is your favorite pattern?

this is GOD's alternative to dealing with stress and worry. 1 peter 5.7 (ph), throw the whole weight of your concern on GOD because HE considers you HIS personal concern. HE carried your sins on the cross, HE will carry your stress and worry in the present. give it to HIM.

just a thought from the front porch…

there is a guaranteed promise of peace of mind...

now paul gives us the result in philippians 4.7 (nlt), if you do this you will experience GOD's peace which is far more wonderful than the human mind can understand. HIS peace will keep your thoughts and your heart quiet and at rest as you trust in CHRIST JESUS.

this is a promise of guaranteed peace of mind. people are looking everywhere for peace of mind. they try pills, fads, therapy, rock crystals, stress reduction seminars and listen to tapes, books -anything to give just a little peace of mind. paul says, GOD's peace is a gift to you. it is a gift that cannot be explained, duplicated, fabricated or understood. it is the sense of peace that comes over your life.

so how do i maintain that kind of peace?

as you trust in CHRIST JESUS. paul is not taking about a religion; he's talking about a relationship with GOD's son JESUS CHRIST.

you were made with a GOD-shaped vacuum in your life and when you try to fill that with anything else it's like trying to put a square into a round hole -it doesn't fit. we try to fill our lives with popularity, power, pleasure, possessions or prestige and they don't fit. GOD made you to know him. nobody is here on the earth by accident. HE made you for a purpose. and the starting point of that purpose is to understand that HE made you for a relationship. HE wants you to know HIM. and when you know HIM there is a sense of peace that comes into your life.

just a thought from the front porch…

what are you becoming?..

philippians 4.8 (niv), finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.

jerusalem bible says, fill your mind with those things.

todays english versions says, fix your mind on them.

paul is saying that changing the way you think involves a deliberate, conscious choice. change the channels of your mind. when a thought comes into your mind, ask "is this true, noble, right...?" if it's not, reject it.

these eight words are eight filters. if the thought is not right, true, pure, lovely, etc. don't think about them. don't allow them to get into your mind, because it's going to create stress.

proverbs 23.7 (nkjv), as he thinks in his heart, so he is. what dominates your mind? what do you think about the most? the root cause of stress and worry is the way i choose to think.

listen, whatever i think about is what i am becoming.

if you don't like the way you're headed, change what you think about. change the direction of your thought life.

just a thought from the front porch…

stress comes from inside yourself...

here is something else that is important to see in handling worry and stress.

to reduce stress in your life you must change the way your think. the stress is in yourself not outside. your mind is a special gift from GOD and your mind is capable of storing over 100 trillion thoughts. it can handle enormous things. and you have been given by GOD the freedom to choose what you think about.

here is what paul says. philippians 4.8 (ms), summing it all up, friends, i'd say you'll do best by filling your minds and meditating on things true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious—the best, not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not things to curse.

summing it all up, he says, you need to chose what you think about and think about the right things. what we put into our minds affects our lives.

what i see that some people allow to enter their minds, no wonder they are under stress. many people, even CHRISTians, are totally careless about what they allow to enter their minds. they are allowing into their minds all kinds of trashy garbage and reading material and movies and songs that are downers. then they wonder why they are depressed.

what you think affects the way you feel; the way you feel affects the way you act. guard your mind. keep your mind on the right things.

just a thought from the front porch…

this is GOD's will for you...

philippians 4. 6, in everything...with thanksgiving. todays english version says, always asking him with a thankful heart.

being thankful helps take care of stress and worry.

the attitude of gratitude. the healthiest human emotion is the attitude of gratitude, having a grateful heart, being thankful. it actually increases your immunities. it is a physical benefit to express the attitude of gratitude. ungrateful people also tend to be unhappy people. nothing ever satisfies them, it's never good enough. they are "when... and then" people -- "when such and such happens then i'll be happy".

if you're depressed, make a list of fifty things you can be grateful for. when you're grateful, it gets the focus off your problems and gets the focus on the benefits in your life. we have so much that we take for granted.

develop the attitude of gratitude and watch the stress level in your life go down. it gets your eyes off the problem and onto the many things we do have to be grateful for.

1 thesalonians 5.18 (ms), be cheerful no matter what; pray all the time; thank God no matter what happens. this is the way GOD wants you who belong to CHRIST JESUS to live. do you want to know GOD’s will for you? thank God no matter what happens. this is the way GOD wants you who belong to CHRIST JESUS to live

listen, there is always something to be grateful for.

just a thought from the front porch…

HE has something superior to replace what you eliminate...

whenever GOD tells you to eliminate something such as worry HE always has something superior to replace it. HE always replaces a negative with a positive.

philippians 4.6 (ms), instead of worrying, pray. let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting GOD know your concerns. the niv translation says, in everything, by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, present your requests to GOD. paul is saying, don't panic – pray.

if you stopped worrying, realize how much free time you'd have. it would create a great vacuum, a void in your life to stop worrying. pray during that time. if those people who say "i don't have time to pray" would spend their time praying instead of worrying, they'd have a whole lot less to worry about.

in everything. some people think that GOD is only interested in you praying about "religious" matters. GOD is interested in everything in your life.

petition is a specific, detailed request. get specific with GOD. tell him exactly what you want and what you need. most people pray too vague, too general. "GOD, bless my life." what is a blessing? sometimes blessings are problems. don't pray general, vague prayers but be specific.

"GOD, i'm under stress. i'm tense, i'm nervous." be specific about it.

phillips, when you pray tell GOD every detail of your needs. if it's big enough to worry about, it's big enough to pray about.

i peter 5.7 (jb), unload all your worries on HIM since HE is looking after you! take our problems to the LORD, pray about everything instead of worrying. unload them! pray is a tremendous safety valve release of pressure.

a life insurance company did a study. they learned that people who attend church once a week, they live on the average, 5.7 years longer than the general public. why? perhaps, people who attend church every week are more likely to pray than worry. worry destroys your system.

GOD says unload all your worries on HIM. the GOD who made every thumbprint in the world different and the GOD who made every snowflake in the world different and the GOD who made every voice print in the world different is a big enough GOD to handle all the details in your life. HE is a GOD of details. HE can handle anything you give HIM.

just a thought here on the front porch…

but i don't want to worry...

some people are born worriers; they have the ability to find a problem in every solution. they look at the negative, the bad. but worry is not natural, it is something you learn; you have to practice to get good at it. so if it is learned it can also be unlearned.

JESUS said in matthew 6.34 (ms), give your entire attention to what GOD is doing right now, and don't get worked up about what may or may not happen tomorrow. GOD will help you deal with whatever hard things come up when the time comes.

in other words in order to relieve stress don’t worry about tomorrow but live one day at a time. remember today is the only day you can live so live it. give your entire attention to what GOD is doing right now. and don't worry or fret about tomorrow. the only ting you have to know about tomorrow is that GOD will help you deal with whatever hard things come up when the time comes.

just a thought from the front porch.

the hardest thing not to do...

in philippians 4 paul comes back to his theme about being happy in life. verse 4 (tev), may you always be joyful in your life in the LORD. i say it again: rejoice! is it possible to be continually joyful?

most people really don't enjoy life; they just endure it. their lives are filled with anxiety, stress, pressure and there's very little joy. and paul tells us from his cell in prison how to manage our pressures and stress.

in verse 6 (ms) he says right out, don't fret or worry. he gets right to the point. he knows worry is a major source of stress.

we all it seems tend to expect the worst in life. smithsonian magazine calls this the age of anxiety. there are macro worries that everybody on the planet worries about. there are micro worries that are personal, that you have everyday.

worry is assuming responsibility that GOD never intended for me to have. it's playing GOD, trying to control the uncontrollable.

dr. walter cavert has done studies on your worries. he has discovered that:

• 40% of our worries never happen
• 30% of our worries concern the past
• 12% of our worries are needless worries about your health
• 10% of our worries are insignificant or petty concerns
• 8% of our worries are really legitimate concerns
  
  

you see worry is worthless. it cannot change the past or control the future. it only messes you up right now. it is an incredible waste of energy. it is stewing without doing. it is a waste of creativity. when we worry about things, they get bigger and bigger. we are very creative about worry.

the bible says, do not worry about anything. probably this is the hardest command to obey.

just a thought from the front porch...

relationships and life need determination...

determination is a very important quality to have in having successful relationships and a fulfilling life. absolutely nothing worthwhile in life happens without effort. the only way you coast is when you're going downhill. if you're coasting in life right now you're headed downhill. paul said, "i fight to the finish."

notice the terms paul uses in here in philippians 3 verses 12 & 13 (niv) i press on, straining toward the mark... i press on to win the prize for which GOD has called me heavenward in CHRIST JESUS. do you feel the intensity of paul here, the determination? press on in the greek literally means "i over extend myself. i go for it with all i've got. i throw myself into it, straining with every nerve and ounce and muscle to reach the prize." he's a man of intensity, maximum effort. no gain without pain. that's the way to live!

what would happen if CHRISTians would put as much energy into growing as they do into making money or their favorite sport?

acts 20.24 (ms), what matters most to me is to finish what GOD started: the job the MASTER JESUS gave me of letting everyone i meet know all about this incredibly extravagant generosity of GOD. this is paul's life verse. paul said he's not going to stop, to give up, quit. he's going to keep on keeping on until he's experienced all that GOD had for him in life. he wanted to finish the purpose for which GOD made him. HE saved you and me for a purpose. paul said he was going to finish what he started.

i hate the word "quit". it sounds like such a loosing word. i don't like the word "impossible" either. GOD says all things are possible. yet the world is full of quitters, people who cop out at the drop of a hat. they give up on their business, their marriage, their kids, relationships, dreams. paul said what matters most to me is to finish what GOD started. i want GOD's best for my life and i'm going to complete what he's called me to do.

just a thought from the front porch...

what really matters to you?...

if all you do is forget the past, you may just have amnesia. it helps to get rid of that emotional baggage from your past but people who make a difference focus on the future.

philippians 3.13-14, (niv), but this one thing i do ... straining toward what is ahead i press on toward the goal. successful people are goal oriented. paul has a single priority: in greek this is the word "one" with an exclamation point -- "one!" he's talking about concentration.

the most common disease today is trying to do 100 different things at the same time. jack of all trades; master of none. most people are spread out too thin.

paul says, find out what counts. he's talking about the power of concentration. if a river spills over its banks you have a marsh, a swamp. but if that river is confined between certain banks, dam it up, channel it and it is a tremendous source of power. light diffused is powerless, weak. if you take power and light and concentrate it you have a laser. it is powerful. that is the power of concentration. life focusing on one thing.

if you want to be really good at something, there is a secret. just concentrate on one thing, specialize. you can't know everything, be everything, do everything.

paul says "i face my faults, forget the former and focus on the future and that is the one thing i do. i have my goal clearly in mind."

less than 5% of the people in america ever write down a life goal. it is not by accident that the 5% that do are the top leaders in their field. write it down and focus on specific goals.

1 corinthians 9.24-25 (ms), you've all...seen the athletes race. everyone runs; one wins. run to win. all good athletes train hard. they do it for a gold medal that tarnishes and fades. you're after one that's gold eternally. they keep their eye on the goal.

what was paul's goal? 2 corinthians 5.9 (ms), pleasing GOD is the main thing. there is no more rewarding goal in life than to please GOD. paul wanted to be able to stand at the end of his life and hear JESUS say, well done thou good and faithful servant. you were faithful in a few things. come into my joy.

the question we ask ourselves is, what am i living for? what is my goal in life? what's most important? if you don't know where you're going, nobody else does. focus on the future.

just a thought from the front porch...

which of these three are hurting your relationships?...

which of these three bags of emotional garbage are you still carrying around in your relationships today?

grudges? who are you still holding a grudge against? a mom? a dad? a brother/sister? a former mate? a former pastor? a former girlfriend? who are you holding the resentment against? let it go!

the bible says, give it up! get rid of it. it only hurts you worse and makes you worse. let it go. if you are allowing people from your past to continue to hurt you in the present, that's not smart. let it go.

some of you hold on to every little hurt in your marriage. you hide it and you keep a stockpile of it so you can use it as ammunition in the next argument. your husband or wife says, "you did this..." and you say, "yes, but you did this..."

i corinthians 13.5 (niv), love keeps no record of wrongs. you don't count or keep score in love. it's unloving to keep score. give up your grudges.

grief? have you built a wall around you? have you become afraid of becoming intimate with anybody? do you think if you get close to somebody you may loose them too? so you become hard and build a shell, a case around your life. have you accepted what cannot be changed? are you looking at what's left, not what's lost? are you playing it down and praying it up?

guilt? are you carrying emotional baggage into relationships that you're trying to develop now in life? things you feel guilt for maybe 20, 30, 40 years ago are affecting your relationships today. you've never let go of them. give up your guilt.

JESUS CHRIST was nailed to a cross so you can quit nailing yourself to a cross. the bible says, therefore if any man be in CHRIST he is a new creature, old things are past away, behold all things are become new.

the moment you commit your life to CHRIST it's washed out, the slate is clean. you become a new person inside. it's being born again, starting over. a brand new shot at life. you do not have to live the rest of your life in a penalty box.

just a thought from the front porch...

what does it mean to confess?...

what do you do with your guilt? you have options:

you can repress it. that doesn't work, pushing it down inside. when i swallow my guilt, my stomach keeps score. or my back, or my migraine headaches, or something. repress it -- that doesn't work.

you can express it -- how? by doing more of the same? "look what a lousy guy i am!" and go out and do more of it! "i'm an immoral person, watch how immoral i can be."

or you confess it. give it to GOD. "GOD, you're right. it was wrong. i'm sorry."

what does it mean to confess?

you don't beg GOD. "please, please, please forgive my sin." you don't have to beg GOD. GOD wants to forgive you more than you want to be forgiven. HE's waiting to forgive you. HE wants to wipe the slate clean.

you don't bargain with GOD. "GOD, if you'll forgive me this time, i will never do it again" – want to bet? if that's your area of weakness you'll be back there in a matter of days. confession does not make you perfect, it just takes care of the past. "GOD, if you'll just forgive me i'll tithe twenty percent of my income!" you don't bargain with GOD.

you don't blame other people. "GOD, the reason i sinned was because it's really their fault. my mother held my face under the bathtub water when i was a little kid. since then i've had repressed emotions. that's why i stabbed the guy in the back. i'm a product of my environment. sociologically culturized to sin." you don't blame, you don't beg, you don't bargain.

you just believe. believe and receive. the bible says 1 john 1.9 (niv), if we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.

that's the soap bar verse of the bible. purify. cleanse. totally cleansing.

that's what GOD says to you.

just a thought from the front porch...

there are two ways to respond to your guilt...

how do you let go of guilt? there are two approaches to guilt. one is right and one is wrong. they are both seen in two of the disciples in the bible -- peter and judas. both peter and judas, on the night before jesus was taken into custody, both denied jesus. they both sinned. but they responded very, very differently to their guilt. one response was right and one response was wrong. you will choose one of these two responses to the guilt you have in life.

the way judas responded was condemnation. self condemnation.

matthew 27:3-5 (niv), when judas, who had betrayed him, saw that JESUS was condemned, he was seized with remorse...then he went out and hanged himself.

he committed suicide, the ultimate expression of self condemnation. he said, "i've blown it! i've made the biggest mistake of my life! i've created the greatest sin! therefore life is worthless and i'm condemned." he went out and took his own life. there are many, many ways to live in condemnation without committing suicide.

but peter, on the other hand, his response was not condemnation but confession.

matthew 26:75 (niv), then peter remembered the word JESUS had spoken...and he went outside and wept bitterly.

he had the same remorse judas did but he confessed his sin. how do i know he did that? because a few days later GOD used him.

peter must have said, "GOD, i'm so sorry. i lived with JESUS CHRIST for 3½ years. i'vewatched every move and when it came down in a clench, i copped out! i denied i ever knew you. ''

peter said, "GOD, how could you use me? i'm so unfaithful." but he confessed his sin. he repented and peter, the man who denied JESUS CHRIST at the crucifixion, was the same man that GOD chose to use 50 days later on the day of pentecost to speak and 3000 people were saved. that's the GOD of the second chance. that's the good news. you confess it to GOD.

just a thought from the front porch...

guilt from your past can hurt your present relationships...

guilt from your past can hurt your relationships in the present. some people refuse to accept forgiveness from GOD. they hang on to their guilt. they lock themselves into a prison as if their paying for their own sins.

a letter received by the pastor of the moody bible church: "i'm 31 years old and divorced. though i fought the divorce bitterly i feel bad because it went ahead anyway and i now feel badly that i have no hope for the future. often i go home from church and cry but there's no one to hold me when i cry. no one cares. i've begged GOD for the grace to be single for HIS glory and to fix my eyes on JESUS, but nothing changes. i continue to fail. i'm a basket case emotionally or on the verge of a collapse. something is very wrong. i'm so crippled and embittered that i can scarcely relate to anybody else anymore. i feel as if i will have to set out the rest of my life in the penalty box."

that describes so many people that i have met. i've met 13-year olds who feel that they are in the penalty box of life. "i've made a mistake and blew it! therefore the rest of my life is plan b. i can no longer have GOD's best for my life because i've made some dumb mistakes. stupid, silly mistakes, therefore the rest of my life is wasted."

if that's the way you feel, you are wrong! there is hope. that is the message of the good news, that we have a forgiving, gracious GOD, the GOD of the second chance. but you've got to give up your guilt.

this could be called the humpty dumpty syndrome of life. "all of the kings horses, and all the kings men, nobody's going to put me back together again." i will be scarred the rest of my life! then you need to meet JESUS CHRIST in a new way. HE is the healer of scars.

so many people are torturing themselves today with guilt and torturing their mate with guilt for things that happened long before they were ever married. and they're taking it out on their marriage today. that's not right either. you have to let go of your guilt –when things you've done have hurt other.

just a thought from the front porch...

focusing on what's left will help your relationships...

david had lost a child and he was grieving but he dealt with it. and grief if not dealt with will hurt your relationships.

2 samuel 12.24 (ms) says, david went and comforted his wife bathsheba. and when he slept with her, they conceived a son. when he was born they named him solomon.

yes he had lost a son but he still had friends, family, loved ones. he looked at what he had left, not what he had lost.

you say, "i don't have much left!" you do, too! you have your life, you live here in the greatest country of the world. you have friends. they will be here. you have a lot more than you're looking at. but you've got to give up your grief.

self pity is much more damaging to your life than any tragedy you'll ever face because it perpetuates the pain long after the pain should be manageable.

remember the movie, "ordinary people"? a family was destroyed from within because they did not learn how to deal with the grief. they didn't know how to let it go.

some of you are still holding on to grief from the past and you're taking it out on relationships in the present and that is not fair to yourself or to them! you've got to let it go.

just a thought from the front porch...

exaggeration in your grief will hurt your relationships...

we are dealing with things from your past that will hurt your present. grief is one of them and in order to get rid of your grief, you play it down and pray it up. you don't exaggerate it – "the world has ended!" the world has not ended. you're heartbroken but the world has not ended. you don't exaggerate it, you dedicate it. you play it down and you pray it up.

notice here in 2 samuel 12 what david did. one of his children had died and it says in verse 20 (ms), david got up from the floor, washed his face and combed his hair, put on a fresh change of clothes, then went into the sanctuary and worshiped.

what did david do with his grief? he went to church. and he worshipped. those of you whose hearts are breaking right now, focus on GOD.

isaiah 6.1 (ms) says, in the year that king uzziah died, i saw the MASTER. he got his eyes off the circumstance and on the ONE who was greater than the circumstance.

i'm not lessening the significance of your loss but i am saying, for your own sake, you must play it down and pray it up. that person in your life is not coming back.

just a thought from the front porch...

if grief can hurt my relationships then how can i get rid of it?

if grief can hurt my relationships and I need to get rid of it then how do i let get rid of it?

there's a story in 2 samuel 12 about david. it's a story that tells us how to let go of grief. david had a illegitimate child by bathsheba. he took another man's wife and had her husband killed. it was a sin. she became pregnant and bore a son and the son became very, very sick. david, it says, laid himself out on the ground and prayed for days, "GOD, save this child! spare the child!" he fasted and prayed and wept. and the child died. we don't always get everything we pray for.

2 samuel 12.16 & 18 (ms), david prayed desperately to GOD for the little boy. he fasted, wouldn't go out, and slept on the floor...on the seventh day the child died.

the first thing david did was he accepted what could not be changed.

2 samuel 12.20 & 22 (ms), david got up from the floor..." while the child was alive," he said, "i fasted and wept, thinking GOD might have mercy on me and the child would live. but now that he's dead, why fast? can i bring him back now?

the answer is no. david said, while there was a chance i prayed and wept but now he's dead. and i've got to get on with life. he accepted what could not be changed.

many of you are in pain now from events that happened years and years ago. the key to your piece of mind is in one word – acceptance. acceptance of GOD's will in your life. GOD does not have a plan b for your life! there is only plan a. GOD is still on his throne and GOD is still in control and you need to accept what cannot be changed. let it go! let go of your grief. it relieves so much pain.

just a thought from the front porch...

grief can cause trouble in our relationships...

grief can cause trouble in our relationships. so we need to give up our grief.

sorrow is a normal part of life. everybody eventually experiences loss. many of you have had losses in the last year. and it hurts. and grieving is a natural part of life. there's nothing wrong with mourning.

matthew 5.4 (niv) says, blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted. i like how the message puts it, you're blessed when you feel you've lost what is most dear to you. only then can you be embraced by the ONE most dear to you.

the bible says it's ok to weep and grieve; it's a part of life.

but there's a big difference between mourning and moaning. moaning is self pity -- "poor me!" when you moan you resign from life. "i quit! i'll never be happy again! i've lost it all!"

you haven't lost it all. you're still here. a lot of people build a wall around themselves and they impose themselves in isolation and say, "i'm never again going to allow anybody to get close to me because i might get hurt again. they get close to me and i loose them. so i'll build a wall and wall out the world. and i'll wall myself in." self inflicted isolation.

listen, pain is a part of life. everybody hurts. everybody reading this has hurts and heartaches. we've all experienced them in life. do not allow your pain to make you a prisoner of that pain. you've got to learn to let go of your grief so you can have good relationships today.

just a thought from the front porch...

who is holding you back in your relationships?...

in dealing with grudges from your past that hurt you in your current relationships you need to see that your past is past. it cannot hurt you any more unless you allow it. let go of your grudges.

job 5.2 (tev), to worry yourself to death with resentment would be a foolish, senseless thing to do. it doesn't help, it only hurts.

who are you holding a grudge against? former girlfriend? former spouse? an employer? a parent? a brother/sister? a teacher who hurt you when you were in school?

many adults are still fighting their parents unconsciously. they say, "i was unloved... i was ignored... i was abused verbally... i was abused physically... i was intimidated... manipulated..." you felt all that hurt growing up in your childhood so you moved away, but you kept the hurt. it went with you when you moved.

now, for some of you, that person who has hurt you in the past has died. now what are you going to do? you're still holding on to the hurt. you need to let go of your grudges.

job 18.4 (tev), you are only hurting yourself with your anger.

to make matters worse, some of you have allowed all of this anger and hurt to pile up from your past and since that person is not around any more, now you take it out on your husband or your wife or your children and that's not fair!

you've got to let go of your grudges and resentments. if you want to get on with your life there's only one alternative, forgive everybody else just as GOD has forgiven you. you're forgiven so be forgiving. for your own sake give up your grudges.

just a thought from the front porch...

but you're not meeting my needs...

some people bring grudges, resentment from their past to their current relationships. but paul says in ephesians 4.31-32 (niv), get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in CHRIST GOD forgave you.

paul says get rid of all bitterness. chuck it! throw it away! eliminate it! don't hold on to resentment. if you do, it will ruin your relationships. there are few things in life that cause more damage to relationships than resentment.

we depend on other people to meet our needs -- physical needs, financial needs, social needs, spiritual needs. and when our needs are not met, we get angry at people. "you're not meeting my needs!" and we get resentful.

but the problem is it doesn't work. it's uncomfortable. when you're resentful, it doesn't upset the other person, it upsets you. they may be out having a great time, and you're at home stewing and spewing saying, "i can't stand that person!" you're the one it's hurting. resentment never hurts the other person; it hurts you.

on top of that, it's worthless. you can be resentful toward people who have hurt you in your past but it will never change the past. no matter how much you resent it, it will never change the past. it's worthless. it never resolves the problem, it only makes it worse.

it's controlling. when you say to somebody, "you make me so mad!" you are admitting your weakness. "you make me..." that means "you" can control my emotions. you have the power to control me. nobody can make you mad without your permission. you are allowing them to make you mad.

some of you have been hurt in the past -- all of us have been hurt in the past -- but some of you are continuing to allow people from your past to hurt you in the present even though they're not around any more and that's dumb! let it go! paul says, get rid of it! get rid of bitterness.

your past is past. it cannot hurt you any more unless you allow it. let go of your grudges.

just a thought here on the front porch...

let's throw out the emotional garbage...

i want us to spend some time at this scripture address. philippians 3.13-14 (niv), i do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. but one thing i do, forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, i press on toward the goal to win the prize for which GOD has called me heavenward in CHRIST JESUS.

paul here is pointing out a fact: he says i let go of the past and strain toward the future and he's making a point that we need to learn in relationships – fact: i cannot relate to the present if i'm still reacting to the past. we bring so many unresolved problems into our current relationships.

a lady looking back on her wedding day said, "when i walked down that aisle in that wedding gown i had no idea that i was carrying with me all kinds of emotional garbage into this relationship. i had to let go of that garbage before this relationship could really get a solid foundation."

we carry three types of emotional baggage...

1) we rehearse our resentments. we go over and over our bitterness, the people we're angry against, and the people that have hurt us.

2) we remember our regrets, the things we've felt guilty about, the things that we regret ("if only...") and remember those things.

and when we rehearse our resentments and remember our regrets...

3) we reinforce our remorse. and we feel down.

when you carry that emotional garbage of rehearsing resentments, remembering regrets, reinforcing our remorse it tends to cause us to react to relationships, rather than enjoying them.

just some thoughts to get us started here on the front porch...

i can let go, i really can...

where are you living at this moment? no i'm not talking about your physical location but your emotional state? are you living in the present or are you living in the past? where you are living emotionally tells so much about what is happening in your relationships and in your joy.

look at what pauls says in philippians 3.13 (niv), this one thing i do, forgetting what is behind. paul says if he is going to be all GOD wants him to be he's not going to waste any more time on yesterday. it's gone. it's past. my past is past. i let go of my guilt, grief, grudges. i let go of the past so i can get on with the present.

isaiah 43.18 (ms), forget about what's happened; don't keep going over old history. be alert, be present. i'm about to do something brand-new.

you might ask, how do you forget? isn't it true our brain stores everything you have ever done? isn't it true that we never really forget anything? so how do i forget the former?

to forget, actually means, don't let the past affect you anymore. don't let it control you or have power over you or manipulate you. you learn from the past without dwelling on the past. there's a big difference. and once you learn, you let it go and move on. you don't keep hounding yourself about the past.

it's human nature. we tend to remember things we should forget and we tend to forget things we should remember. we hold on to the cruddy, garbage memories we should let go of and we tend to forget the things we should remember, the lessons we learned through it all.

just a thought from the front porch...

have you arrived?...

don't you like how paul is so honest about himself and his life? philippians 3.12-13 (niv), not that i have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect. i do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. in the good news translation, i don't claim that i have already succeeded or become perfect.

to me, that's an amazing statement, because paul is an old man now. if anybody had the right to claim he had arrived it would be paul. he wrote most of the new testament. he single handily spread CHRISTianity throughout the roman empire. he made an incredible impact on the world. yet paul, at the end of his life, says "i don't have it all together. i haven't arrived. i'm not perfect. i'm still growing." the point is, successful people never stop growing. they are always developing, growing, expanding, learning. even when he gets to be an old man, in prison, he says, "i haven't arrived."

that is so contrary to people today. many CHRISTians will give you the impression that they never have any problems. they give you the impression that they have arrived. they are sinless perfection, no problems or doubts! i get indigestion from those kinds of people. the longer i grow as a CHRISTian the more acutely aware that i am of my own inadequacies, limitations, weaknesses and faults. rather than saying "look how far i've come," i have to say, "look how far i have to go!" paul says this is the starting point for successful living – to face your faults, be honest, do an evaluation.

proverbs 28.13 (tev), you will never succeed in life if you try to hide your sins. confess them and give them up; then GOD will show mercy to you. successful people are honest about their faults. transparency is a mark of emotional maturity. successful people admit that they have not arrived, that they have a long way to go. sometimes you have to choose between – do i want to look good? or do i want to be good?

the question you ought to ask yourself is, "where do i need to change?" take a personal inventory. we're good at inventorying other people and see where they need to change.

just a thought from the front porch...

i just wanted to say thank you for being there...

i want to say thank you to all of you who have responded to our call yesterday to pray. and i know that you did because of how GOD has answered your prayer in our lives. it's in these times when you don't have any control in the situations of life that being a follower of CHRIST shows that we haven't make a mistake in where we have put our trust. first in GOD and then in other believers.

i know that we in the church don't always come out looking good in all situations but we do in these times. when in our times of need we turn to those who don't follow CHRIST and they do all that they can but all that they can isn't enough. but we are connected to the one who is more than enough.

let me ask those of you who don't have a personal relationship with CHRIST, how do you do it, facing the insurmountable problems of life all alone? how do you do it? well i am so glad that i don't have to face them alone.

i like how paul says it here in philippians 3.12-14 (ms), i'm not saying that i have this all together, that i have it made. but i am well on my way, reaching out for CHRIST, who has so wondrously reached out for me. friends, don't get me wrong: by no means do i count myself an expert in all of this, but i've got my eye on the goal, where GOD is beckoning us onward—to JESUS.

again to those of our friends, thank you for being there in our time of need and without a doubt and i mean without a doubt thank you to GOD for being here with YOUR calming peace and for being out in front with YOUR amazing power.

again, i don't know how those of you make it without the hope that we have in our relationship with GOD.

...just a thought from the front porch...

can you personally trust HIM?...

do you have a relationship with GOD that means you can trust HIM?

we went through a time two years ago where we found out that margaret my wife had cancer. GOD has been there with us through the whole time. today we found out that margaret's sister has cancer and because of our continuing relationtionship with GOD we have a peace because we trust HIM.

what about you and your relationship with HIM? do you know HIM well enough to trust HIM in any situation that you may go through? of course i hope that you haven't had to go through anything like this but if you have and you have a personal relationship with GOD then you too know that HE can be trusted.

also, would you please pray for GOD's healing grace and sustaining grace for us? margaret and i will be leaving in the next few days to be there with mary, christa, rodney and tommy during this difficult time.

here is what JESUS said. john 16.23-24 (ms), this is what I want you to do: ask the FATHER for whatever is in keeping with the things I've revealed to you. ask in MY name, according to MY will, and HE'll most certainly give it to you. your joy will be a river overflowing its banks! and HE can be trusted!!!

just a thought from the front porch...

how do you get to know GOD in a personal way?...

never stop growing and developing your relationship with CHRIST. the moment you stop growing, you're going to lose your joy. so many CHRISTians stay too close to where they "got in" to the CHRISTian life. they haven't grown one bit since they made that initial decision. they don't have any joy.

how do you get to know GOD in a personal way?

it takes time to know anybody, to develop a relationship. it takes time to get to know GOD. you need to spend time alone with GOD to get to know HIM. set down with your bible, read it, pray, talking with GOD about your wants and needs, listening to tapes, spending time with GOD and letting HIM talk with you through HIS word.

you can't develop a relationship in a crowd. the only time many CHRISTians ever think about JESUS CHRIST is in a crowd, when they are with other CHRISTians. they need to develop the relationship on their own, one on one.

it takes talk. you must talk to GOD. pray.

relationships require communication. listen to HIM talk to you as you read his book, the bible. john 16.24 (niv), until now you have not asked for anything in MY name. ask and you will receive, and your joy will be complete. much prayer, much joy in your life. little prayer, little joy. no prayer, no joy.

relationships are built on trust. GOD wants you to learn to trust HIM.

HE will allow all kinds of problems in your life so you can learn that HE is reliable all the time. GOD is reliable in every situation. HE can be counted on to be faithful. i didn't learn this overnight. that is learned from years of going through problems and seeing GOD pull me through it and work them out. you only learn this experiencially. as you go through problems you learn to trust GOD because you realize as HE pulls you through each one of them that is another area you can trust GOD.

paul says that his number one ambition in life is to know CHRIST at the end of his life. he's in jail in rome. he's getting ready to die. he knew CHRIST already, but he wanted to know HIM even better.

just a thought from the front porch...

how well do you know JESUS?...

lasting joy comes from knowing CHRIST better and better. philippians 3.10 (ms), i gave up all that inferior stuff so i could know CHRIST personally, experience HIS resurrection power, be a partner in HIS suffering, and go all the way with HIM to death itself.

paul says his number one goal in life is to know CHRIST better and better. how well do you know JESUS CHRIST? i know a lot of CHRISTians who have been CHRISTians, 5, 10, or more years and they really don't know JESUS CHRIST well. the word "know" in the greek is the word "yada". it means to know intimately, experiencially. it is the same word used when greeks translated the old testament where it says "adam knew eve" and she had a child -- that kind of knowledge. it's the same word in the new testament in the verse that said joseph did not know his wife until JESUS was born.

the amplified version describes this value more clearly. for my determined purpose is that i may know CHRIST – that i may progressively become more deeply and intimately acquainted with HIM, perceiving and recognizing and understanding HIM more strongly and more clearly. this kind of knowledge is personal and progressive -- it's continual and ongoing.

there is a big difference between knowing and knowing about.

just a thought from the front porch...

joy is all in the trade-offs...

philippians 3.7-8 (ms) the very credentials these people are waving around as something special, i'm tearing up and throwing out with the trash—along with everything else i used to take credit for. and why? because of CHRIST. yes, all the things i once thought were so important are gone from my life. compared to the high privilege of knowing CHRIST JESUS as my master, firsthand, everything i once thought i had going for me is insignificant—dog dung.

wow. he says it like it is. paul is saying here that all this stuff that he thought was so important compared to a relationship with CHRIST is insignificant—dog dung. it is all worthless. compared to CHRIST it is dog dung.

we need to know what is important. don't lose your joy over things that really don't count. the number one reason people lose their joy is they get too involved in things that really aren't that important. and paul is saying that what matters most is not your prestige, pedigree, possessions, position or power. you can have it all and still be unhappy.

in luke 12.15 (ms) JESUS says, take care! protect yourself against the least bit of greed. life is not defined by what you have, even when you have a lot.

contrary to what you see on tv, you can't have it all! in v. 8, paul points out that life consists of trade-offs. that's an important lesson you must learn in life. he said he gave up something in order to gain something else. he gave up his religion in order to have a relationship.

as i said, the number one reason why people don't have joy is misplaced priorities. they are afraid that they are going to have to give up something in order to become a CHRISTian. and they're right!

when you come to JESUS CHRIST you give up everything you've got. otherwise you're not a real CHRISTian. it is total commitment. and then you've never had it so good!

what i got is worth more than everything i gave up. you give up guilt and gain a clear conscious. you give up worry and gain a power for living. you give up frustration and lack of purpose in life and gain real meaning and purpose in life. you give up going to hell and gain going to heaven. you gave up trying to solve all your problems in your own power and gain having the resources of GOD to help solve your problems. that's a pretty good trade-off!

jim elliot said, "he is no fool who gives up what he cannot keep for that which he cannot lose."

what are you afraid of giving up for GOD? if you become a CHRISTian, get really committed to CHRIST, really live for JESUS CHRIST, what are you afraid is going to change in your life that you don't want to give up? whatever that is, that is the very thing that is robbing your joy.

just a thought from the front porch...

legalism will kill your joy...

look at paul's list again but in the niv, philippians 3.4-6, though i myself have reason for such confidence. if anyone else thinks he has reason to put confidence in the flesh, i have more. circumcised on the eighth day, of the people of israel, of the tribe of benjamin, a hebrew of the hebrews. in regard to the law, a pharisee. as for zeal, persecuting the church. as for legalistic righteousness, flawless.

paul says here if you want to compare lists, i’ve got you beat by a long shot. he was a super legalist who found out it didn't work and he gives us five examples of legalism that we need to run from today.

1. you begin to trust in rituals. he said, i was circumcised on the eighth day. we have our own rituals today. baptism, communion, catechism, baby dedicated. if you fall into this trap of trusting these for your salvation, you're in trouble.

2. you trust in race. i was of the people of israel, of the tribe of benjamin. benjamin was the purest tribe. paul was named after the first king, saul, who was a benjaminite. paul says he used to trust in his heritage.

have you ever heard anyone say, "daddy's a CHRISTian... my mom was a believer... my uncle was a pastor." you can get religion by osmosis but you can't get CHRIST by osmosis.

3. you trust in religion. i was a hebrew of the hebrews. paul was a religious person.

JESUS has nothing to do with religion except HE's 100% opposed to it. religion is man's attempt to get to GOD. works. JESUS CHRIST is GOD's attempt to get to man. that's a relationship and that's a big difference. no denomination has a copyright on truth or a patent on GOD.

4. you trust in rules. in regard to the law, a pharisee. paul was a pharasee. he kept all the rules

we think of the pharisees as hypocrites but there were some genuine, sincere ones. they were the spiritually elite of that age. they took the ten commandments and expanded them into 619 other commandments. and they were legalists!

a pharisee would not even eat an egg if it were laid on the sabbath, because that was considered work. if he got bit by a mosquito on the sabbath, he would not scratch because that was considered work. a pharisee would not allow a woman to look in a mirror on the sabbath because she might see a grey hair and pull it and that would be considered work. they were pros at rules and regulations.

5. you trust in reputation. as for zeal and legalistic righteousness, faultless.

today we have people saying, "i read the bible, i witness, i go to church..." that's legalism.
the point is there is nothing wrong with any of these things. the problem is thinking that they give me points with GOD. and they don't. HE loves you unconditionally.

romans 14.17 (ms) GOD's kingdom isn't a matter of what you put in your stomach, for goodness' sake. it's what GOD does with your life as he sets it right, puts it together, and completes it with joy.

paul said CHRISTianity is not a matter of rules, rituals and regulations. if the CHRISTian life were a bunch of "don'ts" anybody that was dead would qualify as a CHRISTian, because they don't do anything.

just a thought from the front porch...