lower your expectations a little bit...

and finally, the most important thing that you could do to not be so quick to anger is change your expectations. our anger always starts in our thoughts – our expectations of how things are going to work out.

proverbs 4.23 (ncv) says, be careful what you think because your thoughts run your life. the way you think eventually is going to run your life. we have expectations of what’s going to happen. when those expectations don’t match reality, the further apart those are, the angrier we become. we tend to get angry.

for example, you buy a christmas present and it says on it: easy assembly required. if it had said, this sucker is going to take 20 hours of your blood, sweat and tears and still not look right, that’s ok. but here you are on christmas eve with bloody knuckles because it says “easy assembly required,” and you’re angry. your expectations and reality just didn’t match.

so … you’re out on the golf course. you’ve got a little white ball, and you’re going to hit it right down the middle of the fairway. that’s your expectation. when expectation doesn’t meet reality, sometimes a broken golf club is a result! when expectations don’t meet reality, we can find ourselves doing the craziest things.

so… you expect a martha stewart thanksgiving. the smell of the turkey wafting from the oven, a perfectly browned turkey. you bring it into the table and set it down to “ahhh” and some light clapping in the background. you expect that you’re going to get along perfectly with someone you haven’t liked for 25 years. you expect soft music playing in the background instead of the football game. or you expect the football game instead of soft music. either way, expectations and reality just aren’t matching.

i encourage you! lower your expectations a little bit. have different expectations for thanksgiving like, “at least no one died from food poisoning this year.” then anything above that is like a win! the stuffing didn’t turn out, but at least no one stuffed the turkey down any one else’s throat. that was a good thing this thanksgiving.

we laugh, but i know what a painful time this can be for some of us. my encouragement to you is to ask GOD for a new sense of expectations. no, it’s not going to turn out perfectly. irritating people are still going to be irritating people. but that doesn’t mean GOD can’t be there. it doesn’t mean GOD’s goodness is not real.

just a thought from the front porch…