But I’m not angry…

This whole area of admitting instead of blaming can be a difficult thing to do.  Lionel my fictional friend who came to my front porch for emotional healing found it so.  So I discussed with him that the reason why it is difficult to admit we have a problem is because we want to play God.  That’s it.

You see, we have something inside of us that wants to decide what is right and what is wrong.  You say, "I don't want anybody telling me what is right or wrong.  I know what is right and wrong for me.  I am my own boss.  I make my rules.  I am the center of my universe and I am going to live my own way, if it feels good, I am going to do it.  I don't want anybody telling me what to do with my own life."

Lionel was angry that his wife had left him. He had a right to be angry. And no one had a right to tell him anything different.  But that attiude was messing up his life.

Is that true of you in whatever area that is in your life.  Why is it you over eat or drink too much alcohol or whatever your problem that controls you is?  Nobody is going to tell me what to do. 

But to get your life on the right road, you need to realize that you are not God.

Lionel wanted to know how he was playing God?  Good question.  Maybe you have that question too.

I told him that we play God by denying we are humane and trying to control everything for selfish reasons. We want to be in control so we try to control ourselves; we try to control other people and everything around us.

  

We try to control our image.  We want to control what other people think of us; we don't want other people to really know what we are like.  Is that true?

We play games, we wear masks, we pretend, we fake it, we want people to see certain sides of us and we hide other sides and we deny our weaknesses and we deny our feelings.   "I'm not angry.  I'm not upset.  I'm not worried.  I'm not afraid."  We don't want people to see the real us.

So I told him here is the problem.  If I tell you who I really am and you don't like me, tough on me 'cause I'm all I've got.  So we try to hide and we try to control our image.  That’s a good place to stop for today.

Ok?  Ok…