For over 50 years Hollywood has been teaching us a
myth that if I just find the right person then I'll live happily ever
after. You may have walked down the
aisle at your wedding fully thinking, "I'm going to live happily ever
after!" but you were in for a big surprise! Things just don't turn out
that way.
In the wedding the sequence is: aisle, alter, hymn. After the wedding it just becomes "I'll
alter him." It may have started off
as an ideal, then your marriage becomes an ordeal, then you start looking for a
new deal. Or the three rings: the engagement ring, the wedding ring, then
the suffering.
But the fact is, even the best of relationships goes
through ups and downs. Every
relationship has its difficult times.
You're not happy all the time in a relationship. So people get sick, we argue, we have
misunderstandings, sometimes we're inconsiderate, sometimes things just don't
go right. Life is not a constant
honeymoon.
Whenever we look for relationships, whether it's in
a marriage or a good, close friendship, people say "I just want to be
happy." And there's nothing wrong with that. But for the next while we're going to look at
something far better than happiness.
What you need in your relationships is not happiness; what you need is
joy.
And that's a lot different from happiness. Happiness depends upon happenings. It comes from the word "hap" which
means "luck, happenstance"; you're just lucky, fortunate, and
happy. Happiness is external; joy is
internal. Happiness is based on
circumstances and when they change you're not happy anymore; joy is based on CHRIST. Happiness is based on chance; joy is based on
your choice.
So we are going to look here on the front porch at
how joy helps with our relationships.
Just a thought from the front porch…
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