Sunday, March 6, 2011

that’s what love is all about…

all the money in the world can’t replace your time with your wife, your husband, your kids, those you love.  whenever you give your time you’re making a sacrifice of your life because your time is your life.  but that’s what love is all about, it’s about sacrifice.  sacrifice is the essence of love. 

ephesians 5.2 (nlt), live a life filled with love following the example of CHRIST who loved you and gave HIMself as a sacrifice to take away your sins. 

if it isn’t a sacrifice, it’s not real love.  you may call it that but it’s not.  if it isn’t a sacrifice, it’s not real love.  you can give without loving but you cannot love – legitimately love – without giving.  love is the essence of sacrifice.  love means giving up – giving up my ambitions, giving up my preferences, giving up my likes, giving up my particular thing that i think is fun, giving up my energy, giving up my time for the benefit of somebody else.  that's what love is.  giving up my time and my preferences for the benefit of someone else.  it’s a sacrifice.

many of you are in time-starved relationships.  you live in the same home but you’re passing each other by day and by night like ships with a goodbye kiss here and there and your relationship is shriveling.  it’s shrinking.  it’s drying up for lack of attention. 

a lot of things can rob a relationship.  work can rob a relationship.  activity can rob a relationship.  too much church involvement or ministry can rob a relationship.  hobbies.  fun things that you like to do on your own can rob a relationship.  tv can rob a relationship.  computers can rob a relationship. 

somebody says, “how can i have more time for those i love?”  turn off the tv and unplug the computer.  i'm not saying get rid of them.  i'm just saying limit them.  the average american now watches tv and/or works or plays on the computer an average of five to six hours a day.  that’s over 30 hours a week.  that’s 1,560 hours a year.  let me put that in perspective.  one thousand five hundred sixty hours a year is the equivalent of spending 97 days straight at 16 hours a day watching tv or playing or working on the computer.  that’s bound to hurt a relationship. 

just a thought from the front porch…

8 comments:

Lauren K said...

I actually completely disagree with you on this. I think unless you love someone for yourself you do not truly love them. If it is a sacrifice that you're making, then it implies you don't really want to love them or spend time with them...you'd rather be doing something else. I would still put my family before other things in my life, because I love them more than other things, but it is not a sacrifice, it is based on my priorities and my love. How can I truly love something if I'm sacrificing myself? How can I claim to have any feelings whatsoever if I am at the lowest rung on the ladder. If I don't consider what I want and recognise how important someone is to me, how can I care? And if I gave up something that I really considered important for the sake of someone else...what a horrible burden for them to bare! I go to my brother's karate exams because I want to be there...I do it for me, because I love him. I help my sister with her piano and violin practice because I want to do it...anything else would be less meaningful...I have to be in the equation of my love. Anyone who says I'm doing it as a sacrifice is hugely mistaken, I do it because I love them, it's my choice.

Bill Williams said...

thank you, lauren, for your thoughts and your perspective. i value them!

Lauren K said...

Cheers!

mannoy said...

I think I agree with Lauren. I think you already know about OFW's from the Philippines. They sacrifice their time and presence with their families in order to support them what ever the risk may be. Money is not everything but for your kids education you need it... your families food and health you need it... your home or shelter you need it.. your social responsibilities you need it... what else can I say, Quality or quantity time, it depends on how they appreciate the effort you are doing that matters.

Bill Williams said...

all i can say is, i love no matter the response. that comes from my relationship with CHRIST which means i love no matter what i get. that is called agape love or unconditional love.

Lauren K said...

Hi there Bill,

I'm writing a post and I wanted to quote some of the stuff you've said in this post (backlinked to you of course)...As you're aware my position is quite different from yours, and I'm arguing against what you say, however I don't mean this in a malicious way, I'm just trying to think through my thoughts on it. Just wanted to get your ok to quote you and I would love for you to check out my post when it's finished!

Cheers,

Lauren K

Bill Williams said...

no problem, lauren. have at it!

Lauren K said...

Cheers!

Here's the link if you're interested:

http://secondfresh.com/?p=603

Would love to know your thoughts!