rehearse it or release it…

in matthew 5.7 (niv) JESUS said, blessed are the merciful for they will be shown mercy. 

listen, forgiveness is a lifestyle.  it must be continual and it must be constant.  you get to enjoy it but you also must employ it.  you must ask forgiveness, you must offer forgiveness and you must accept forgiveness.  and forgiveness is the hallmark of a CHRISTian.  and if you won’t forgive don’t call yourself a CHRISTian. 

we receive it and we give it.  we enjoy it and we employ it.  we accept it and we offer it.  it is what being a CHRISTian is all about. 

i know that you’ve already been hurt a lot in life.  and you’re going to be hurt some more.  when you get hurt you only have two options in life, only two: rehearse it or release it.  that’s it. 

you can go over and over and over in your mind and every time you go over it in your mind you drive that thorn deeper in your heart.  and it hurts more and more and more every time you rehearse it.  and you allow that person from your past to control your present by choosing to let them keep you under their control by resentment. 

or you can release it.  rehearsing it just perpetuates the pain.  releasing it is the path to inner peace.  forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors.  forgive us our sins as we forgive those who have sinned against us.  that is the path to peace.

job 11 says this, put your heart right.  reach out to GOD.  then face the world again, firm and courageous, and all your troubles will fade from your memory like floods that are past and remembered no more.

just a thought from the front porch…  

we’re going to need it again…

another reason why you’ve got to let it go of that hurt that someone did to you is because you are going to need forgiveness again.

i will need forgiveness in the future.  i’m going to need it today, tomorrow and the day after that. 

and JESUS says this in matthew 18.35 (gnt), this is how MY heavenly FATHER will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother from your heart.  we cannot receive what we’re unwilling to give. 

if you want forgiveness you’ve got to offer forgiveness.  that’s the equation.  forgive us our sins as we forgive those who have sinned against us. 

do you realize what you’re praying when you pray the LORD’s prayer?  “GOD, i want YOU to forgive me as much as i forgive everybody else.”  do we really want to pray that prayer?  GOD i want YOU to forgive me as much as i forgive everybody else.  that’s what the LORD’s prayer says. 

one day a guy came to john wesley and said, “i can never forgive that man!”  wesley said, “then i hope you never sin.”  forgiveness is a two way street.  don’t burn the bridge you need to get to heaven.  forgiveness is a two way street.  don’t burn that bridge.

notice it says, this is how MY heavenly FATHER will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother from your heart.  notice, from your heart. 

HE’s saying forgiveness has to be more than intellectual.  it has to be emotional.  you have to emotionally let it go.  you have to do it from the heart.

just a thought from the front porch… 

reacting because they remind you…

there are three tests to see who we are to forgive.  we looked yesterday at the blame test and the bitterness test and here is the third one, the behavior test.

this one goes like this: do you ever find yourself reacting to someone because they remind you of somebody else?  “you’re just like my father/mother/ brother/sister.” 

what you’ve done is you’ve never done business with the original person and never settled that issue and you’ve never let it go so now what you’ve done is you’ve taken all that frustration and anger and resentment and you’ve turned it on this innocent party so that all of a sudden in a moment they remind you of somebody else and you explode.  and that’s not fair and you are killing the marriage. 

listen, you need to do business with the person you’re really angry at.  you need to let it go and then you can get on with your life and not let some other relationship destroy a current relationship.  maybe it’s a former spouse or whatever. 

job 5.2 (gnt) says, to worry yourself to death with resentment would be a foolish, senseless thing to do. 

in the story in matthew 18 that we have been looking at, when the man refused to be forgiving to other people the king says throw him into prison and let the torturers have him.

when you start being resentful GOD doesn’t have to throw you into prison you do it to yourself.  resentment is a self-imposed prison and every time you go over and over and over it in your mind you just hurt yourself again instead of getting on with your life and living a life of peace. 

listen, you cannot afford the luxury of a bitter heart no matter what happens in your life.  you cannot hold on to it.  it only makes it worse. 

i don’t know what you’ve gone through but you’ve got to let it go because god has forgiven you and because resentment doesn’t work.  it only makes you miserable.  it only prolongs the pain. 

just a thought from the front porch… 

what you feel controls what you do…

JESUS tells a story in matthew 18 of a slave who owed his master millions of dollars and after he had pleaded with the master, the master forgave totally his debt.

how would you feel if all of a sudden you had no house payment, no car payments, no credit card payments?  how would you feel?  you would probably feel relief, joy.  and hopefully you would feel gracious to others.  i’ve just been forgiven all my debts.  i should go out and show a little grace to somebody else. 

but that’s not what this guy did in the story.  matthew 18.28-30 (tniv), but when that servant [who had just been forgiven twelve million dollars] went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred denari.  he grabbed him and began to choke him.  “pay back what you owe me,” he demanded.  his fellow servant fell to his knees and begged him, “be patient with me and i will pay you back,” [almost the same words he had said to the king.]  but he refused.  instead he went off and had the man thrown into prison until he could pay the debt.

get this guy!  he’s just been forgiven a twelve million dollars debt.  he goes out and finds a guy that owes him a hundred denari.  that’s seventeen bucks.  it says he grabs him, starts making demands and he starts to choke him. 

this is kind of comical because actually in roman law you were allowed to choke somebody who owed you money.  squeeze it out of him.  by law he could do this.  and because this guy can’t pay him seventeen bucks he has him thrown into prison.

 

why in the world was this guy so harsh?  because in his heart he didn’t really believe the king had forgiven his debt. 

he says, “i know…  i heard what the guy said.  but i’m going to pay him back.  even if it starts with seventeen bucks at a time i’m going to figure out a way to pay him back.” 

here’s the point.  when we feel unforgiven we tend to be unforgiving.  when we feel ungraced we tend to be ungracious to others.

many of you are CHRISTians but you still don’t understand grace.  and in your heart you’re thinking, “i’m going to make it up to you, GOD.  i know you’ve forgiven all my sins.  i know you’ve given me eternal life in heaven.  so i’m going to make it up to you.  and i’m going to pay you back, GOD.”  and you go out and you try to earn your forgiveness and that makes you rigid and unbending. 

but HE has forgiven you!!!  accept it and believe it!!!

just a thought from the front porch…

HE did it now we must do it…

matthew 18.23-27 (nlt),  therefore, the kingdom of heaven can be compared to a king who decided to bring his accounts up to date with servants who had borrowed money from him. in the process, one of his debtors was brought in who owed him millions of dollars.  he couldn’t pay, so his master ordered that he be sold — along with his wife, his children, and everything he owned — to pay the debt.  but the man fell down before his master and begged him, “please, be patient with me, and i will pay it all.”   then his master was filled with pity for him, and he released him and forgave his debt.

now there may be someone in your life who has really wronged you.  and JESUS in this story is telling some reasons why we are to forgive them.   one reason is because GOD has forgiven me, HE has forgiven you. 

twelve million dollars of debt, completely forgiven but that’s nothing compared to how much GOD has forgiven you. 

listen you owe GOD an awful lot, more than you’ll ever be able to repay.  GOD says, “I’m going to wipe the slate clean and you are completely forgiven.” 

romans 8.1 (ncv), those who are in CHRIST JESUS are not judged guilty.

now here’s the clincher.  GOD expects you to do to others what HE has done to you.  if you want to be forgiven by GOD, GOD expects you to forgive other people. 

just a thought from the front porch…

learn to let it go…

now JESUS tells a story in matthew 18 (niv).  it’s called the parable of the unforgiving servant.  in this story HE illustrates why we must learn to forgive, learn to let go.

verse 23, therefore the kingdom of heaven is like a king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants.  as he began the settlement, a man who owed him ten thousand talents was brought to him.”  

the king calls up and says, everybody who owes me any money, bring them all in and we’re going to settle the accounts right now.  and they bring in this one guy who owes ten thousand talents to the king.  that is about twelve million dollars.  there’s no way he’s ever going to get out of it.

in those days bankruptcy was a whole lot simpler than it is today.  you would take the man, throw him in prison and take his wife and children and sell them into slavery.  i’m glad that isn’t true today. 

next verse, since he was not able to pay the master ordered that he and his wife and his children and all that he had be sold to repay the debt. 

notice the servant’s response:  the servant fell on his knees before him.  “be patient with me,” he begged, “and i will pay everything back.”  he says, “just give me a few more days.” 

now there’s no way he’s going to pay this back.  if he paid back $1000 a day for thirty years that still wouldn’t equal twelve million bucks. 

the king’s response: so the servant’s master took pity on him, canceled the debt and let him go.  he said, “we’ll just write it off. you are forgiven.” 

listen, i don’t know what grudge you’re carrying.  i don’t know who has hurt you in the past, what memory haunts you today. 

some of you are thinking, “i could never forgive that or that person.  they hurt me.  they hurt me bad.  i don’t want to let it go.  i don’t want to forget it.  i want to hold on to that hurt and i want to hold on to my anger and resentment against them.  but you’ve got to let it go.

just a thought from the front porch…

two greatest barriers to peace of mind…

we are continuing in our phrase by phrase look through the LORD’s prayer, looking at how to have inner peace in this stress filled world that we live in and two greatest barriers to peace of mind without a doubt are guilt and resentment.  guilt comes from what we do to other people.  resentment comes from what other people do to us.

now we have talked about that the only antidote to guilt is to receive the forgiveness of GOD.  and in the same way the only antidote to resentment is to offer the forgiveness of GOD to other people. 

we have been looking at the first part of matthew 6.12 (lb), now we’ll look at the second part.  forgive us our sins just as we have forgiven those who have sinned against us.  we are to forgive others just like we have been forgiven. 

in life you’re going to be hurt many times, sometimes intentionally, sometimes unintentionally.  and the source is not what’s important but how you choose to respond to the hurt.  the only way you can get inner peace when you’ve been hurt is to let it go, to forgive.

just a thought from the front porch…

a second truth about how GOD forgives us…

there’s second truth about how GOD forgives us.  GOD forgives me, not only instantly but HE forgives me repeatedly. 

a quick survey.  how many of you reading this have committed the same sin more than once?  we all have these areas of perpetual failure in our lives where we keep struggling.  we’re caught in this cycle of defeat.  we keep stumbling.  GOD forgives repeatedly. 

the bible tells us in nehemiah 9.17 (Gwt), YOU are a forgiving GOD, one who is compassionate, merciful, patient, and always ready to forgive.

not just the first time you struggle with sin and commit a sin but always ready to forgive.  in fact, GOD is more eager to forgive you than you or i are to ask HIM for forgiveness.  that’s the kind of GOD that HE is. 

i used to think (and sometimes still think) that GOD gets tired of me coming back to HIM again and again with the same struggle.  “here i am again, LORD, to talk to you about the same thing i talked to you about before – ten minutes ago – confessing the same sin.”  i would think GOD would be up there in heaven, looking down at me saying, “couldn’t you at least get creative about your sin?  it’s the same thing again and again and again.”  the truth is i’m the one, i am the one tired of having to confess the same thing again and again.   GOD never tires of me coming to HIM, never tires of you coming to HIM to talk about the fact that you need HIS forgiveness, the fact that HE is a forgiving GOD and to ask for HIS forgiveness. 

JESUS loves to forgive you more than you or i could ever imagine.  when you ask the bible tells us in hebrew 7.25, that CHRIST is always living to intercede on our behalf.  HE’s always doing that. 

just a thought from the front porch…

there’s this huge lie out there about guilt…

there’s this huge lie out there about guilt.  you may have heard this lie.  you may have thought this lie.  the lie is guilt makes me a better person.  if i just feel a little bit guilty maybe i’ll do the right thing next time.

but it never works.  it just gets you caught in the trap of doing the wrong thing, trying to do the right thing, doing the wrong thing again.  it’s an endless cycle.  it doesn’t make you a better person it just makes you a miserable person feeling trapped the rest of your life. 

the truth is some of you feel guilty about not feeling guilty.  your motto is “i should always feel guilty about something.”  then you’ll feel better about yourself. 

no, you won’t.  you feel worse about yourself. 

the truth is GOD tells us HE wants to forgive us.  and that we need HIS forgiveness to live the kind of life HE wants us to live. 

HE not only wants us to know that we’re forgiven by HIM; HE wants us to feel that we are forgiven by HIM because HE forgives us instantly. 

just a thought from the front porch…

the ways GOD forgives…

some of you say, “there’s something in my life i know is wrong.  i regretted it from the moment i did it.  and i’ve asked GOD over and over and over to forgive me.  every time i think about it i still ask HIM to forgive me.  but i don’t feel forgiven.”

what’s the problem?  what is the problem with that?

the problem is not GOD.  the problem is you don’t understand the ways GOD forgives. 

 so how does GOD forgive?

well for one, GOD forgives me instantly.  HE forgives me instantly, the moment that i ask.  there is no hesitation.  there is no delay.  GOD forgives instantly. 

the bible tells us in isaiah 55.7 (gnt), let the wicked leave their way of life and change their way of thinking.  let them turn to the LORD our GOD.  HE is merciful and quick to forgive.  HE is quick to forgive.  the moment you ask, without delay, GOD forgives. 

we have a hard time understanding this.  as human beings this is the exact opposite of how we often forgive.  we’re often slow to forgive. 

we like to hold it over people’s heads a little bit.  if someone asks us to forgive them we say, “i’ll think about it.”  we wait a little bit to forgive because the truth is we want them to suffer a little bit first before we forgive them.  we want them to beg a little bit.  we want them to grovel.  we want them to suffer.  we want to rub it in just little bit before we forgive them.  we don’t want to let them off that easy. 

but GOD is always quick to forgive.  the moment you and i go to HIM, HE forgives us that instant.  HE never holds it over our head.  HE’s perfect.  that’s how GOD forgives us.  HE never makes us wait. 

1 john 1.9 (gnt), if we confess our sins to GOD HE will keep HIS promise and do what is right.  HE will forgive us our sins and make purify us from all our wrongdoing. 

so how long should a believer feel guilty?  i’d say about fifteen seconds!  that’s about how long it takes for you to realize “i’ve sinned.  i’ve done something that’s hurt not only my heart and the people around me but the heart of GOD.”  take it to GOD, confess it to GOD and release it to GOD. 

just a thought from the front porch…

there’s only one antidote to guilt…

another way we try to deal with guilt is distractions.  that is, “i’m never going to slow down long enough so i won’t have to think about it.”  so i rush around from one event, one activity to the next trying to do what i want to do, trying to do what i need to get done so at night i can come home and crash.  lay my head down on the pillow and go to sleep before those depressing, guilty thoughts start filling my mind and haunting me again.

guilt is probably one of the primary causes of workacholism.  a lot of workaholics are running from something.  they’re trying to run away from something they know is wrong in their life and they’ve never dealt with it so they just try to stay busy so they don’t have to think about it. 

then one we’re all familiar with is escapism.  pop a pill, have a drink, smoke a joint, watch tv, go to disney world, take up a sport, play the lottery; any kind of thing to kind of escape from the depression of my guilt. 

the problem is that none of these work.  none of these will help you to get rid of guilt in your life. 

there was a guy who called up on the phone to one of those talk radio psychologists and he said, “i am so guilty,” and he poured out what he had done to this radio psychologist.  he said, “i’m so guilty!  how can i get rid of my guilt?”  the psychologist said, “you can’t.  you’ve got to live with it.” 

that is what someone who doesn’t believe in GOD would say. fortunately you don’t have to live with it.  fortunately nobody reading this – i don’t care what you’ve done – if you’ll stick with me during the next few days here on the porch and apply what we’ll talk about, there’s not a single person who needs to stay on a guilt trip.  there’s not a single person who needs to leave the  front porch without a clear conscious. 

there’s only one antidote and it’s the next phrase that we are going to look at in the LORD’s prayer.  it’s found in matthew 6.12 (niv),  forgive us our debts. 

there’s only one antidote to guilt and it is forgiveness.  while other people may forgive you for things you did against them, all the personal sins in your life the only person who can forgive you for that is GOD.  you need GOD’s forgiveness. 

just a beginning thought from the front porch…

forgiveness and conflicts…

now in dealing with this problem of conflicts with other people, james here in chapter 4 says to give in to GOD, get wise to satan, draw closer to GOD and then be willing to ask forgiveness.  this is very difficult for a prideful person.

if you want to stop conflicts in your life, if you want to get along with other people, learn to ask forgiveness from GOD and from those you’ve hurt.  james 4.8-9 (niv), wash your hands…and purify your hearts.

our hands represent our conduct and hearts represent attitudes.  he’s saying, clean up your act.  and then verse 9 (nlt), let there be tears for what you have done.

in other words, don’t minimize what’s happened.  take it seriously.  be sorry for your self-centeredness.  it’s a big deal when your wife’s feelings are hurt, or your husband’s, or kid’s.  take it seriously.  if someone says you’ve hurt them, you’ve hurt them.  it may not be a big deal to you, but it is to them.  be willing to ask forgiveness.

now is there someone who keeps coming to mind while we have been dealing with conflict?  would you like to begin to resolve the conflict with that person?  how do you do it?  are you willing to go and apologize for your part?  maybe they are 95% wrong and you are only 5% at fault, but you take care of your 5% and let GOD handle the other 95% in their life.  their response is their response.

“i know we’ve had our differences and i know i haven't always been thoughtful.  a lot of times i’ve thought more about myself than your needs.”  how humbling that would be.  right?  because GOD gives grace to the humble!

if you want to change, the only way you're going to change is to want to be humble and the only way to be humble is to go and ask forgiveness. 

it’s hard but do you want to change?  do you want to reduce the conflict?  maybe the way you do it is by cracking the door open by your taking the first step even if they are primarily at fault.  admit what you’ve brought into the relationship that was wrong.  it’s humbling, sure but GOD gives grace to the humble.

maybe this week you need to write a letter, make a call, make some restitution even to that person that irritates you – joyce landorff calls an irregular person – those heavenly sandpapers that irritate you.  take the first step.

just a thought from the front porch…

the difference between forgiveness and trust…

i want to challenge you to develop a reputation wherever you work for the person who shows mercy.  i don’t think CHRISTians should be known for what we’re against: “they’re against that and that and that and that…” i think CHRISTians should be known for our mercy.  “he’s the most forgiving person in the office…  she’s the most merciful person at our worksite.” 

job was famous for his mercy.  he had a friend named eliphaz who said this about him.  job 4:4a (gw), when someone stumbled you lifted him up with your words.  i love that!  isn’t that great?  you lifted him up with your words.  as a retired pastor i’m very keenly aware of the power of our words.  you can build people up or you can tear them down.  it says you lifted them up.

how do you do that?  when someone makes a mistake, when someone blows it, when someone sins around you how do you lift them up with your words?  you don’t rub it in rub it out.  that’s the way you lift people up with your words.  you don’t rub it in: “that was stupid!  what were you thinking when you did that?  you idiot!” no, you don’t rub it in, you rub it out. 

another thing, you help them focus on what’s left not what’s lost.  when people make a mistake they always lose something.  so you help them focus on what’s left not what’s lost.  that is showing mercy to people.  when people blow it they don’t need a sermon.  they need mercy.  that’s one of the ways you can bless people.

some of you have a hard time doing this because you don’t know the difference between forgiveness and trust.  they are not the same thing.  you are called to forgive people immediately whether they ask for it or not.  in fact, if you are a CHRISTian you have to forgive people.  it’s not optional for you.  if you claim to be a believer, if you claim to be a follower of JESUS CHRIST, you have to forgive them.  but that doesn’t mean you continue to let them do what they are doing.

for instance, if you’re in a home situation and someone has been abusing you, you have to forgive them so you don’t hold on to resentment and grudge.  but you don’t have to let them continue to abuse you.  trust is different.  trust is built over time with a track record.  you earn trust.  forgiveness is grace.  trust is earned.  that’s why people misunderstand.  for instance, when a leader blows it or sins in a major way then somebody will say, “why would we remove him from office?  shouldn’t he be forgiven?”  yes!  forgiveness is immediate and demanded and instant.  but trust must be rebuilt over time.  you forgive them but that doesn’t mean they stay in leadership.  they have to earn the trust again because all leadership is built on trust.

so you learn to be forgiving immediately and instantly so you don’t hold on to a grudge. 

just a thought from the front porch…

allow HIM to forgive…

joseph’s brothers were still living with guilt twenty years later.  they go down to egypt and they’re going to buy some grain and guess who the brothers meet up with?  joseph.  he might have a veil on or some of the officials then might be behind a partition, they wouldn’t get close to people.  i don’t know exactly why but they could hear each other but not see each other real closely.  he might have been high up, away from them.  they talk and communicate but they don’t know who joseph is.  but joseph knows who they are.  he recognizes them.

they come in and say, “we need some food.”  joseph devises a little test.  he says, “i’ll give you some food but if you want some food i’ve got to see that younger brother.”  they begin to struggle with that. 

genesis 42.20-21 (niv), “you’ve got to bring your youngest brother to me so that your words may be verified and that you may not die.”  and this they proceeded to do.  “surely we are being punished because of our brother.”

benjamin?  no, joseph!

“we saw how distressed he was when he pleaded with us for his life but we wouldn’t listen.  that’s why this distress has come upon us.” 

twenty, at least, years later they remembered vividly how he pleaded for his life.  and every bad thing that happened in their life they’d think, “GOD’s punishing us.” 

any of you ever felt like that?  then get it settled!  don’t live with your solution, live with GOD’s solution.  live with HIS forgiveness.  learn to forgive and allow HIM to forgive.  you don’t have to feel like every time something bad happens that it’s punishment for what i did wrong.  that’s a family living with their solution. 

joseph has this test.  then he sends them away.  verse 25, joseph gave orders to fill their bags with grain and put each man’s silver that they brought to buy the grain within the sack.  after this was done they loaded the grain on their donkeys and they left.  they stopped and they looked in their sack and the silver was there.  their hearts sank and they turned to each other trembling “what is this that GOD has done to us?” 

that’s guilt twenty years later, unresolved guilt! 

if you’re feeling that way every time something goes bad, get HIS forgiveness.  you don’t have to feel that, “GOD’s punishing us or what is this that GOD has done to us?”

just a thought from the front porch…

learn to forgive…

on the way towards that dream there were probably some people that hurt you.  when you reach that dream there are probably some people that wronged you.  if you hold on to an unforgiveness towards those people, you end up ruining the dream.  it would have for joseph.

genesis 42 you hear the story of joseph and his brothers.  we go back to square one.  here’s joseph.  he has the dream, he’s over in egypt second ruler in all of egypt, he’s feeding the world, and here’s his brothers. 

verse 1. (niv), when jacob learned that there was grain in egypt and he said to his sons, “why do you just keep looking at each other?”  because of their fear.

in genesis 42 you see the picture of a family who’s living with their solution instead of GOD’s solution.  you see the picture of grief twenty to twenty-four years later.  you see the picture of guilt at least twenty years later.  grief and guilt were still a part of this family’s life even a generation later.  look in verse 4 at the grief that’s still there. 

ten of joseph’s brothers went down to buy grain from egypt but jacob didn’t send benjamin, joseph’s brother, with the others because he was afraid that harm might come to him. 

benjamin was the youngest brother.  the grief is still there, twenty years later.  when they sold joseph into slavery they thought they were getting rid of their problem.  they hadn’t solved their problem.  they invited their problem to move in, right next door, right in their house, right in their bedroom for twenty years.  that’s what happens when it’s our solution not GOD’s solution. 

some of you are living with your solution right now.  you’re thinking right now, “that’s the truth!”  you can make a change. 

just a thought from the front porch…

JESUS' reaction to doubts…

some people think that doubt is unforgivable. but it’s not. actually, GOD doesn’t condemn us when we question HIM. a great biblical example of this is john the baptist. if anybody in history should have been absolutely sure who JESUS is, it would have been john the baptist. he’s the guy who pointed at JESUS and said, behold the LAMB of GOD who takes away the sin of the world. this is the guy who baptized JESUS and he saw the heavens open up and heard the voice of GOD say, this is MY SON in whom I'm well pleased. this is the guy who pointed at JESUS CHRIST and said, i have seen and i testify that this is the SON of GOD.

he had incredible faith. but something happens. he gets arrested and gets thrown into jail. there he comes down with the virus of doubt. now he’s not so sure. “is JESUS really who he claims to be? or should we be looking for someone else?” so to resolve this he sends two of his friends to go check JESUS out and ask him point blank, “are YOU the MESSIAH? are YOU the ONE we’ve been waiting for to rescue the world? or should we look elsewhere?” so his two friends go. they track JESUS down and they ask JESUS that question.

now it’s very interesting the reaction of JESUS. does JESUS say, “what is wrong with john? the idiot! if anybody should know who I am, it’s john!” does HE criticize him, does HE slam-dunk him, does HE disqualify him from any role in the kingdom of GOD? no. the bible says in luke 7.22 (nkjv) , JESUS answered and said to them, “go and tell john the things you have seen and heard: that the blind see, the lame walk, the lepers are cleansed, the deaf hear, the dead are raised, the poor have the gospel preached to them.”  in other words, JESUS is saying, “go back and tell john about these evidences you have seen with your own eyes that authenticate MY claim to being the one and only SON of GOD and that will renew his confidence and will bolster back up his faith.”

so how does this affect JESUS’ opinion of john? does HE now think that john is worthless and could do no good for the kingdom of GOD any more? no. it is after this episode JESUS gets up one day and looks the people in the eye and says, I say to you, among those born of women there is no one greater than john. john had doubted. JESUS is giving john the highest compliment in the world at the very same time, john has questions and concerns and doubts.

and i think the lesson for us is when you have questions and concerns and when you have doubts, GOD does not slam-dunk you. HE wants to dialogue with you.

that’s not to say that doubt is praiseworthy. the bible never says that. but it does say, i think, that in any relationship, we want honesty. your relationship to your spouse, if you’re married, or with your parents you just want honesty. that’s what GOD wants with us. in our relationship with HIM, HE wants us to be honest about, these are the doubts i have, these are the questions i have, this is what i wrestle with, this the area that i am struggling with.

and there’s confidence that HE’s not going to turn his back and walk the other way and be disgusted by that. but HE’s going to reach out to you and say, “let me help you come to resolution and bolster your faith just as I bolstered the faith of john the baptist.”

just a thought from the front porch…

a tremendous realization...

let’s review the basics:

1) there is nothing that you can do that will ever make GOD love you more than HE does right now already. nothing.

2) there is nothing you can ever do that will ever make GOD love you any less than HE already does right now. you can’t make HIM love you less because HIS love is based on who HE is – a loving GOD.

every one of you – every one of us – have an area of habitual failure. that’s the sin you keep stumbling over. it’s that habit. it may be your temper. it may be your words. it may be lust. it may be impatience. a million different things. but it’s an area that you just keep stumbling over. so here’s what happens:

when you blow it and you fail in that area, you come to GOD and say, “GOD, i’m so sorry. please forgive me.” and GOD says, “of course I forgives you.” if we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and purify us from all sin. 1 john 1.9 (niv)

then the next day you go out and blow it again. you come back: “GOD, i did it again. i’m sorry. i need forgiveness. i need cleansing. and i need your power to change.” GOD says “ok.”

on the third day, you’re starting to get a little nervous. you’re coming back with the same sin. “i’m really sorry.” and GOD says, “i forgive you.” ten minutes later you do it again. now you’re really embarrassed. i hate to come back to GOD. you tend to even stop asking for forgiveness because it’s the same thing over and over. you think GOD’s sitting up in heaven saying, “the same ones? can’t you think of any new sins to do? you’ve got the same old sin over and over. how boring!” and you say, “how can i ask GOD to forgive me?

i keep falling and falling in this same area.” you sometimes even stop asking for forgiveness because you don’t think you’re ever going to change.

two things about that area of habitual sin:

1) GOD never gets tired of forgiving you. HE will forgive you fifteen hundred times a day if you were SPIRITually sensitive enough to ask. GOD does not get tired of forgiving you for the same sin over and over. it is GOD’s nature to be forgiving.

2) if you’re really serious about changing an area of habitual failure, here’s the key: you’ve got to find someone who will hold you accountable. you say, “anything but that! i don’t want to tell anybody about that.” that’s why you can’t change. the bible says, GOD gives grace to the humble. your pride is keeping you from changing. you can’t figure it out. if you could, you would have changed ten years ago and you haven’t. it’s still there. as long as you think, “me and JESUS. i’m going to figure it all out and i don’t need anybody to tell me what it’s all about,” you’re not going to change.

just a thought from the front porch…

forgiveness. but why?

forgiveness. why should i do that? when they have hurt me so much, why should i forgive them?

1. GOD has forgiven you. you’ll never have to forgive anybody more than you’ve been forgiven by GOD.

2. bitterness makes you miserable. it doesn’t work.

3. forgiveness is a two-way street and you’re going to need more forgiveness in the future. we pray in the LORD’s prayer, “forgive us our debts as we forgive everybody else.” forgive us, in the same way we forgive everybody that’s hurt us. do you really want to pray that? GOD, i want you to forgive me as much as i’ve forgiven everybody else.

you say “but i could never forgive that person.” then i hope you never sin. because forgiveness is a two-way bridge, and don’t burn the bridge you’re going to have to cross over to get to heaven. we are to forgive others because we have been forgiven.

there’s an amazing truth that happens that when you hold on to a hurt: the more you hold on the hurt, the more you focus on the offender. and the more you focus on the offender, the more you actually move toward them. and any psychology book will tell you that whatever you focus on and move toward, you end up becoming. here’s the point: if you don’t release them, you end up resembling them. “i’ll never be like my mother!” oh yeah? the more you focus on the very person who hurt you, the more you become like them. you’ve got to let it go. there’s not a better time than right now.

just a thought from the porch…

the secret of genuine forgiveness…

what is the secret of genuine forgiveness? remember how much i’ve been forgiven. that’s the secret. remember how much i’ve been forgiven by GOD. i remember what it cost JESUS CHRIST to forgive me. all the things i’ve done. i’m not spotless. i’m not blameless. i’ve hurt a lot of people in my life. and so have you.

colossians 3.13 (nlt), remember the LORD forgave you so you must forgive others. GOD has forgiven you, so HE expects you to forgive those who have hurt you.

ephesians 4.32 (niv), be kind and compassionate to one other, forgiving each other just as in CHRIST, GOD forgive you. notice in CHRIST. you were forgiven, not because you deserve it. not because you earned it. not because you balance it out with good works. not because you promised never to sin again. but because you have put your faith in JESUS CHRIST. you’ve accepted HIS salvation. JESUS CHRIST is your SAVIOR.

what does that mean – to make JESUS CHRIST my SAVIOR? it means i accept HIS forgiveness for all i’ve done. and i am forgiven. not because i’ve worked for it. not because my good works are more than my bad works or the good things i’ve done are better than the bad things i’ve done in life. it’s because i’m in CHRIST. that’s the only way you get GOD’s forgiveness. you need to remember that.

i have no doubt that many of you are carrying deep painful wounds from the way you’ve been hurt by other people. and from the bottom of my heart, i am sorry. i’m really sorry. when you think about that betrayal, that hurt, that rejection or whatever it was, it seems as fresh now as it was when it happened. it may have been months, it may have been years, but you are still holding on to that hurt. just me talking about it, it pops back up in your mind. how are you going to get on with your life? there is only one way. forgiveness. it’s the only way you’re going to get on with your life and get over the hurt.

just a thought from the front porch…

to get past the forgiveness barrier…

it is not always possible, it is not always advisable that you physically go back to the people who hurt you. you shouldn’t always go back to that person. things may have changed. they may be unaware of how they hurt you. they may have remarried. maybe it would make matters worse. maybe they’ve moved away, and it’s impossible to find them. they may have died. some of you hold resentment against people who are no longer even alive. it’s not always advisable or even possible to go back to that person.

one of the things you can do is the technique of the empty chair. you set an empty chair in front of you, and you imagine that person in it and say, “GOD, i don’t know where they are, and i don’t know if it would even be the right thing to go back to them. it might stir up a hornet’s nest. but right now, i’m imagining that person there. i forgive them in the name of JESUS CHRIST. i’m giving up my right to get even. i’m letting it go. i’m asking YOU to help me to want YOU to bless that person.

another way is to write a letter to the person that you never mail. you spell out your pain. you say, “what you did hurt me. that rejection, that abuse, that mistrust, that betrayal, that criticism, that neglect, that apathy – whatever. that hurt me.” and you spell it out. you don’t minimize it. “but i have been forgiven so much by GOD, and i know that this is the right thing to do. i don’t want to go on with my life feeling and holding this resentment, this grudge, this pain, this burden in my heart.” because what you’d be doing is continuing to allow them to control you. “so i’m letting you go.” you write it in the letter, and you never mail the letter.

what i’ve described to you is not easy. it’s not easy at all. in fact, i have no doubt that there’s some relationships right here, there’s some marriages that are about to self-destruct. and they’re about to self-destruct not because of a hurt that was done – the hurt was the instigator – but because of the unforgiveness. it is not the hurt that destroys the marriage; it’s the refusal to forgive that destroys the marriage. it’s holding on and holding it over the person’s head. and some of you are in so much pain that every bone in your body wants to run out of that marriage, run out of that relationship – find somebody new just to ease the pain.

these steps are not easy, but with GOD’s power, you can do it. there’s a line in a song that says, “we can’t just trust our feelings. we have to stand in the LORD.” that’s the only way you’re going to get past this forgiveness barrier. you say, “i don’t feel like forgiving.” who does? nobody ever feels like forgiving. you do it because it’s the right thing to do, and you do it to get on with your life. we have to stand in the LORD.

just a thought from the front porch…